Friday, September 25, 2009

It’s hard to say when I first noticed that I was no longer throwing myself at the world but instead shying away and letting it take control of me. I think it’s been somewhat gradual coming on, but definitely since turning 50, I’ve noticed that I haven’t been so gung ho about trying new things. I try to blame it on my hormones or lack thereof, which has caused me to morph from the young, “try anything once” kind of girl to a neurotic little old lady. I’m crankier, my body temperature is hotter, my hair is flatter, my tummy is pouchier and my patience is thinner. I couldn’t have changed myself more if I had woke up and found myself 13 again.

My confidence had left my body along with those hormones and I want to get it back. So, I’m challenging myself to one month of attempting to overcome some of my biggest fears in hopes that I will once again be willing to take on our ever changing world. Please don’t expect me to wrestle an alligator or sky-dive…those are fears of mine, but not something that will help me catch up with the 21st century. I’m talking more about the things that would have been easy for me in my 20’s but impossible for me when I don’t know what Bluetooth is and get overwhelmed trying to find out. I’m barely able to use my cell phone and my computer is a tool for catching up with my family through email. If I did learn how to text, who would I text? I tried to join face book, but less than 24 hours after joining, I had an invite from a very clingy old boyfriend that I’ve spent years trying to throw off my trail. Delete, delete!!

I should try to learn those things, or rather, I will learn those things, but in the pretext of how a 50 year old might use them. So, for the entire month of October (the scary month) I will enter a daily blog about what my challenge was for the day and how it turned out. I hope other women out there who have found themselves in a similar situation when they turned 50 will be able to laugh along as they too try and face their own fears. And in the end, maybe we’ll discover that our generation does have a use for Twitter after all.

Karen